Every family goes to the doctor at least once per year. How many times do you enter the appointment on time, but then go through 33 minutes of wait time until you actually see the doctor who triple-booked your time slot? But hey, who’s counting stuff like that?
Typically, we pass the idle time with toys, books, and snacks. Plus,we also need to occupy the kids. Wait, did you get that joke? If not, re-read the last two sentences. That’s called “Dad Humor”, which I’ve been accused of many times.
After our typical measures to combat boredom, I surveyed the office for creative things to do. The otoscope looked fun, but probably not the best choice if the doc walked in… seeing me checking everybody’s ears, noses, and belly buttons. Yeah, bad idea. Then there were the cotton swabs, alcohol bottles, and gauze pads. We could play Frankenstein, but that might not play well if the doc walked in either. Could you picture the scene? The door opens with your doctor looking down at his clipboard to see who he is talking to next. He lifts his head to witness the Walking Dead, where a room full of gauzed and bandaged patients moaned in pain, holding their arms straight out. It would be funny. Definitely memorable. But it may have us looking for a new doctor.
These thoughts crossed my mind as I canvassed the room for Dadnamic ideas. And then I saw it. Right behind me on the window sill – A box of blue rubber gloves. Hand balloons. I thought. Perfect. Minimal risk of injury and loss of doctor. Let’s do it!
I blew up 3 hand balloons to the normal allowable inflation level. This was preconceived in order to avoid several risks. However, my 10-year-old said the following at the 0:59 mark. “BIGGER! BIGGER!” Then he threw down the Triple Dog Dare at the 1:06 mark and said. “BIGGER. ULTRA BIGGER!” He had just said “Ultra”. Now I had a choice to make. I carefully weighed the various risks.
Risk 1: Small doctors office + Confined space = Space Risk… Could I use up all the air from the room?
Risk 2: Top floor office + Less oxygen = Lungs Risk… Could I pass out?
Risk 3: Sharp Doctor Tools + Hand balloons = Piercing Risk… Could I accidentally pop the oversized balloon and cause the dreaded hand balloon fart?
Risk 4: Large family + Hand balloons = Embarrassment Risk… What if the doctor walked in right then; what would they say?
I carefully weighed these risks against the potential gain and took his hand balloon to the max inflation level.
Fortunately, we averted all four risks and satisfied all four kids.
